Sunday, April 8, 2012

Keeping Romance Alive After 60

Last night my husband took me on a date to the Hollywood Forever Cemetery.  He wouldn't tell me why we were going to a cemetery on a date, or what we were doing there until we pulled into the gates and found a parking spot near the graves.  He wanted the evening he had carefully planned to be a surprise!

We were there to see the actor, Val Kilmer perform in a one man show called "Citizen Twain,"  a play about humorist Mark Twain. Val Kilmer wrote, directed, produced and was the sole performer in the play ... although he was accompanied at times by four live musicians.  He was performing his play at the cemetery because, as he pointed out, Mark Twain is dead!  The Masonic Lodge at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery in Hollywood, California also has a nice, private upstairs theater that seats about 220 - 250 people.  Val Kilmer strolled up and down the aisles and mingled with the audience as he performed, so nearly everyone was able to see well and feel close in these intimate surroundings.

The Element of Surprise can Enhance Your Marriage

My husband and I had never been to such a unique performance, and definitely had never been to a play at a cemetery.  Even though we are both in our 60's, this was a first for both of us ... which is exactly what my husband wanted.  Although we have been married over 40 years, he still likes to surprise me with special dates that are unique and interesting. 

On another occasion, he took me to a mystery dinner theater, where the wait staff were all members of the cast.  After the lights were momentarily dimmed, we watched in mock horror as one member of the cast was found "dead" on the dining room floor.  All of our waiters and waitresses were suspects.  Slowly, the dinner guests unraveled the mystery.  It was delightful.

My husband has also surprised me with concert tickets, tickets to musicals, and dinners at unusual restaurants.  He doesn't plan a major surprise every month; only, perhaps, once or twice a year.  However, when he does, it is always a delight.

Find Ways to Bring Fun into Your Marriage

There are other ways that a couple can enjoy fun activities together.  Perhaps you like to travel, go camping, sailing or walking on the beach.  Do you share a love of great food, animals, or artwork?

When elderly couples are interviewed and asked the reason for their long marriages, they nearly always say that it is important to have a sense of humor.  More than anything, it is important to find activities that make you laugh together.

Laughter seems to be closely entwined with romance.  Having fun should be a focus of every couple.

Snuggle Frequently

Of course, it is also romantic to hug, kiss, snuggle and engage in all the forms of physical contact that the two of you enjoy.  Couples who never touch frequently grow apart. 

Sometimes, in our busy lives, we can fall into a routine that makes us feel like we are living with a roommate rather than a romantic partner.  Every couple should take the time to, at the very least, kiss and hug as often as possible.

Do Not Forget Romantic Occasions

Few things can damage that romantic feeling more than a forgotten anniversary, birthday, Valentine's Day or special occasion.  While those days may not seem like a big deal to you, they can be very important to your partner. 

You don't have to make a big deal out of every holiday.  However, it is important to acknowledge them as an opportunity to show your love and appreciation for your partner ... even if it is only with a homemade card or drugstore box of candy.

Marriages Should Not Become Dull and Stagnant

My point is that marriage and other relationships do not have to become stale and stagnant after a couple has been together a long time.  You can still find ways to keep your romance alive and feeling new.  It is never too late to come up with a romantic surprise of your own!


For additional ideas about enjoying life after sixty, use the tabs or pull down menu at the top of this page for links to hundreds of additional articles on changing family relationships, where to retire, financial planning and more.

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2 comments:

  1. I loved reading this. You and your husband are romantics at heart and it is obviously one of the reasons you have been together for so long. For years, my husband and I would take turns surprising each other on our anniversary with a major trip. The only thing the "surprisee" knew is what kind of of things to pack - swim suits or snow suits. And on the trip, there were always little surprises too. Great fun!

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  2. I love the idea of packing for a trip, and not know where you are going! What a fun idea. We have never tried an adventure like that and will certainly have to add it to our list of romantic things to do! Thanks for sharing.

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