Be Brave - Lose the Beige - Finding Your Sass After Sixty - A Book Review

From Amazon: https://amzn.to/3JK00RQ (Ad)

As a retirement blogger, I am often asked to review more retirement books than I can possibly read.  However, when I was asked to review the new book, "Be Brave. Lose the Beige! Finding Your Sass After Sixty,"  I was immediately charmed by the title. 

Most of us, after a certain age, feel pulled between "acting our age" and wanting to still feel free to kick up our heels and enjoy the remaining decades of our life.  How often have we been told that older women should not wear short skirts, low cut blouses, colorful clothing, big earrings, or anything that brings attention to us?  I was curious to read what the author of this book, Liz Kitchens, had to say about brightening our lives instead of muting ourselves as we age.

In the opening pages, I loved how she refers to our generation of women as "Lady Boomers."  What a great description!  This book "began as a blog and evolved into stories that chronicle how creative thinking helped this baby boomer cope with Empty Nest Syndrome, navigate sex over sixty, and transition from being "outtasight" to being literally out of sight."

Doesn't that description already make you want to order a copy of "Be Brave - Lose the Beige"? (Ad)

Chapter Titles Sure to Pique Your Interest:

The Creativity Evangelist

The 'Tweener Generation

Brother Time and Sister Space: Navigating Life's Transitions

Your Rx for Aging

Gummies, Pets and Ex-husbands

The Power of the Purse

The Reluctant Angel

Great Grand Parenting (One of my favorite chapters)

Caregivers Living in Color

What's Next, Boomer?

Each chapter ends with a special "Exercise Your Creativity" idea to help you apply the message in that chapter to your own life.  

The book is full of practical suggestions for managing your relationship with your recently retired spouse, your adult children, and your grandchildren, while maintaining your own identity and enjoying your life.  It also talks about being more selective in your friendships, so there is better balance in your relationships.  In other words, you can learn how to help others, while maintaining boundaries and not allowing yourself to be consumed by the needs of other people in your life.  It is not easy, but this book will help get you started in the right direction.

The BBLB Manual of Maxims

The book ends with a list of maxims which the author suggests for Lady Boomers.  She also recommends that you add a few of your own.  After all, you are trying to learn to think and live more creatively, not just follow someone else's set of rules!

She has written 35 Maxims.  Here are five maxims I particularly liked, but you will probably have your own favorites:

Breaking little rules is empowering

Don't let kid demands derail the pursuit of your passions

Seek out the silver linings

Avoid becoming someone's oxygen tank

Take calculated risks

If you liked these five maxims, you are sure to like the rest of the list.

Set Aside Time to be Charmed

I was delighted by reading "Be Brave - Lose the Beige."(Ad)  Many of the retirement books I am asked to review are very dry manuscripts about financial planning, rescuing your finances, and taking care of your health.  There is nothing wrong with these books.  Those are important topics for retirees.  However, this book is a delight to read, talks about your relationship with others, and will change your relationship with yourself!  Enjoy it! 

From the Amazon Reviews:

"Be Brave. Lose the Beige! started as a blog and morphed into a movement. This movement gently pokes fun at ageist rules and expectations. It says “yes” when the rest of the world keeps saying “no.” 

"The stories and creative techniques outlined in this book are guaranteed to introduce color, sass, and a lightness of spirit into your later years. Are you ready to start coloring outside the lines, even if a few pesky rules get trampled in the process?"

About the Author:

Liz Kitchens conducts workshops and seminars on creativity, is the founder of "What’s Next Boomer?" and of the website, "Be Brave. Lose the Beige," which focuses on issues facing women of the baby boomer generation. She is also a contributing writer for the online magazine, "Sixty and Me," for the over-60 crowd.  She is an insightful and interesting writer. 

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Buy at DeborahDianGifts.etsy.com

One of the ways that I have personally exercised my creativity as a Lady Boomer has been to start an Etsy store.  I love designing the different products or personalized cards inside the jewelry gift boxes, and then having everything professionally made and delivered to my Etsy buyers.

The background card inside the gift boxes for some of my jewelry (like the friendship bracelet in this photo) can be personalized with the name of the person you are giving it to, or you can send me a special message you would like included.  Just message me on Etsy at DeborahDianGifts.etsy.com

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If you are interested in learning more about retirement, Medicare, Social Security, common medical issues as we age, financial planning, where to retire and more, use the tabs or pull down menu at the top of the page to find links to hundreds of additional helpful articles.

Disclosure: This blog may contain affiliate links. If you decide to make a purchase from an Etsy or Amazon ad, I'll make a small commission to support this blog, at no extra cost to you.

You are reading from the blog: http://www.baby-boomer-retirement.com

Photo credit: Amazon and Etsy

Start a Baby Boomer's Club in Your Community

We Baby Boomers like to stick together.  Although there are many differences among us, we also have had numerous shared experiences over the decades, including our enjoyment of the music of our youth.  As a result, one of the most popular clubs in our homeowner's association is the Baby Boomers Club.

Our retirement community, like most over-55 developments, has a large number of clubs and organizations for the benefit of the residents.  There seems to be something for everyone ... bridge, golf, tennis, writing, paddleboard, swimming, fishing and dancing clubs.  About five years ago, a group of the first Baby Boomers to move into our community started their own club, too, and since its inception it has been a big hit.

Activities of the Baby Boomers Club

The Baby Boomers Club is not one of those organizations where everyone gets together to chat, eat snacks, have political discussions or quilt.  It fact, it is one of the more physically active groups in the community.  All of their gatherings are major social events and are well-attended by both men and women.  Some of the recent activities they have hosted or co-hosted with other clubs are:

Regular Saturday night dances featuring music from the 60's, 70's and 80's.
A Woodstock Festival at one of our clubhouse parking lots
Trips to area attractions, concerts, casinos, etc.
Cruises
Beach parties

Benefits of a Baby Boomers Club

After retirement, many people feel cut off from the work connections they made over the years.  Joining a club is one way to make friends and form new connections.  It is also a way to celebrate life and return to those activities and hobbies that you loved when you were young.

While you may also benefit from taking an art class, bridge lessons, or getting more exercise, joining a group of your peers who enjoy the same music, the same dance styles, and who have similar interests is one way to enjoy reliving your memories and celebrating the life you have lived.

The relaxed, friendly socialization has also had an additional benefit for some members.  A number of couples in our community have met and begun dating as the result of having attended one of the events held by the Baby Boomers Club and other organizations.

If your current retirement community has not already started a Baby Boomers club, this may be a good time to start one yourself.  Baby Boomers are turning 65 at the rate of 10,000 to 11,000 a month.  Many of these new retirees are choosing to move into over-55 communities that have a wide assortment of amenities.  Now is the time for your community to begin welcoming your peers as they move in, and to help them feel they have found the right home!


If you are planning to retire soon, you may also be interested in looking through the links in the index articles below.

Gifts, Travel and Family Relationships

Great Places for Boomers to Retire Overseas

Great Places to Retire in the United States

Health and Medical Topics for Baby Boomers

Money and Financial Planning for Retirement


You are reading from the blog:  http://baby-boomer-retirement.blogspot.com

Photo of a sunset wedding is courtesy of morguefile.com

Watch 'Hope Springs' for Baby Boomer Couples

The movie "Hope Springs" is a thought-provoking film for Baby Boomers who are either married or in a long term relationship.  My husband and I viewed this movie with two other couples who have also been married over 40 years.  When we discussed it afterwards, we agreed that we had all enjoyed it, and we acknowledged that it had brought up some interesting issues in our own relationships.

Plot Summary of "Hope Springs"

The movie is about a couple, Kay and Arnold, who have been married 31 years.  They now sleep in separate bedrooms, and have very little intimacy left in their relationship.  Kay arranges for the two of them to spend a week in intensive marriage therapy in the town of Great Hope Springs, Maine.

Kay is played by Meryl Streep, her husband Arnold is played by Tommy Lee Jones, and their therapist is played by Steve Carell.  With this cast, the movie could have easily slipped into being a silly, light-hearted situation comedy, but all of the actors play their parts with sincerity and honesty.  The topics that are discussed in the movie are subjects that are difficult for most couples to discuss, and the actors are able to portray that discomfort convincingly.

This Movie Could Enhance Your Own Relationship

This movie is designed for a narrow audience, primarily people over the age of 50 who are in committed relationships and, because of this, it will surely never be considered a blockbuster movie for any of these actors.  Performing in this film almost certainly was a labor of love.  However, for those who are open to seeing it, just viewing this movie could bring life back into a marriage that has slipped into boredom and repetition.

What better gift can we give each other, as we prepare for retirement, than to bring enthusiasm and romance back into our lives?

If you are interested in reading more about changing family relationships after retirement, where to retire, financial planning, medical issues and more, use the tabs or pull down menu at the top of the page to find links to hundreds of other helpful articles.

You are reading from the blog:  http://www.baby-boomer-retirement.com

Photo:  wikipedia.com/commons  User: PhotoTakeReality

Keeping Romance Alive After 60

Last night my husband took me on a date to the Hollywood Forever Cemetery.  He wouldn't tell me why we were going to a cemetery on a date, or what we were doing there until we pulled into the gates and found a parking spot near the graves.  He wanted the evening he had carefully planned to be a surprise!

We were there to see the actor, Val Kilmer perform in a one man show called "Citizen Twain,"  a play about humorist Mark Twain. Val Kilmer wrote, directed, produced and was the sole performer in the play ... although he was accompanied at times by four live musicians.  He was performing his play at the cemetery because, as he pointed out, Mark Twain is dead!  The Masonic Lodge at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery in Hollywood, California also has a nice, private upstairs theater that seats about 220 - 250 people.  Val Kilmer strolled up and down the aisles and mingled with the audience as he performed, so nearly everyone was able to see well and feel close in these intimate surroundings.

The Element of Surprise can Enhance Your Marriage

My husband and I had never been to such a unique performance, and definitely had never been to a play at a cemetery.  Even though we are both in our 60's, this was a first for both of us ... which is exactly what my husband wanted.  Although we have been married over 40 years, he still likes to surprise me with special dates that are unique and interesting. 

On another occasion, he took me to a mystery dinner theater, where the wait staff were all members of the cast.  After the lights were momentarily dimmed, we watched in mock horror as one member of the cast was found "dead" on the dining room floor.  All of our waiters and waitresses were suspects.  Slowly, the dinner guests unraveled the mystery.  It was delightful.

My husband has also surprised me with concert tickets, tickets to musicals, and dinners at unusual restaurants.  He doesn't plan a major surprise every month; only, perhaps, once or twice a year.  However, when he does, it is always a delight.

Find Ways to Bring Fun into Your Marriage

There are other ways that a couple can enjoy fun activities together.  Perhaps you like to travel, go camping, sailing or walking on the beach.  Do you share a love of great food, animals, or artwork?

When elderly couples are interviewed and asked the reason for their long marriages, they nearly always say that it is important to have a sense of humor.  More than anything, it is important to find activities that make you laugh together.

Laughter seems to be closely entwined with romance.  Having fun should be a focus of every couple.

Snuggle Frequently

Of course, it is also romantic to hug, kiss, snuggle and engage in all the forms of physical contact that the two of you enjoy.  Couples who never touch frequently grow apart. 

Sometimes, in our busy lives, we can fall into a routine that makes us feel like we are living with a roommate rather than a romantic partner.  Every couple should take the time to, at the very least, kiss and hug as often as possible.

Do Not Forget Romantic Occasions

Few things can damage that romantic feeling more than a forgotten anniversary, birthday, Valentine's Day or special occasion.  While those days may not seem like a big deal to you, they can be very important to your partner. 

You don't have to make a big deal out of every holiday.  However, it is important to acknowledge them as an opportunity to show your love and appreciation for your partner ... even if it is only with a homemade card or drugstore box of candy.

Marriages Should Not Become Dull and Stagnant

My point is that marriage and other relationships do not have to become stale and stagnant after a couple has been together a long time.  You can still find ways to keep your romance alive and feeling new.  It is never too late to come up with a romantic surprise of your own!


For additional ideas about enjoying life after sixty, use the tabs or pull down menu at the top of this page for links to hundreds of additional articles on changing family relationships, where to retire, financial planning and more.

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